


South Park: Homecoming

by FLWR801



Series: Spider Tweek [1]
Category: South Park
Genre: Alternate Universe - Spider-Man Fusion, F/M, Gen, M/M, One-Sided Attraction, Secret Identity, Violence but not graphic, i really love spider man okay, im sorry i just love this ship, the old ship switcheroo, the villain is kinda like the vulture, why are all villains furries
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-08
Updated: 2018-07-21
Packaged: 2019-05-19 14:38:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 10,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14875659
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FLWR801/pseuds/FLWR801
Summary: Tweek didn't exactly ask to be a superhero. He wasn't complaining though.





	1. Chapter 1

Tweek sat on top of a rooftop, watching the Queens skyline from up ahead. His job could get frantic, but sometimes it was nice to take a step back and just overlook the-and there goes the sirens. Tweek sighed, slipping his mask on. He shot a web out towards the sound, watching as it latched onto a building. The hero swung down, following the sound of the siren to a bank with broken windows at the front. He hopped on the roof, slipping in on the ceiling. He watched the robbers for a minute, almost snickering at the plastic Justice League masks. “Oh, hey! It’s the Justice League! Batman, Superman, Cyborg. Big fan, I’m Spider-Man.” He announced, the trio looking towards the vigilante. Superman quickly pointed a gun at him. “Woah-ho-ho! That’s no way to treat your fellow superhero, is it?” He hopped down with a kick to Superman’s chest, sending them flying into the wall. Before the thief could stand up, Tweek webbed them against the wall. “Wait a second, you guys aren’t the Justice League! Your Cyborg kinda gives it away.” The Cyborg masked criminal aimed a punch towards Spider-Man, the hero quickly dodging. “God, do you ever shut up?!” Tweek shook his head. “‘Fraid not. Kinda my thing, y’know?”

Tweek felt the hairs on his neck raise up, quickly flipping out of the way as a bullet went soaring past him. “Oh, c’mon Batman! I expected something cooler out of you!” He quickly punched the Cyborg down, webbing him to the floor. The hero saw the Batman try to escape, shooting a web on his back and reeling him in. “Leaving your friends? Dick move, man.” He quickly strapped him to the ceiling, pulling a notepad out and sticking a note on the Superman’s face. 

‘These guys aren’t even good at their jobs! On the bright side, put the money bags back in the vault :) - Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man’

Tweek flung himself out via the ceiling, seeing the small crowd pointing at him. He noticed a familiar face in the crowd, a camera aimed at the hero. Tweek smiled under his mask. ‘Craig’s gonna get a huge raise for these.’ He flipped down, walking up to his friend. “Make sure you get my good side.” He winked, glad he made his suit able to move with his eyes. A sense of accomplishment rushed over him as he saw a faint blush creep up on Craig’s face. Before his friend could respond, the hero swung off, avoiding the dozens of people asking questions.

He hopped into an alley near his small apartment, slipping out of the spider suit into his clothes. He hopped up the stairs, rushed on adrenaline. Tweek opened the door, his mom sitting on the couch. “Oh, hey dear! How was the job today?” She asked. “It was fine. Not much to tell when you’re working in the back of a Publix.” He yawned. “It was long though. I think I’m gonna head to bed.” His mom gave a quick kiss to his forehead. “Sleep well, dear. Love you.” “Love you, mom.” He walked into his room, bouncing off the walls when he closed the door. Literally “I flirted with Craig! I hit on my crush! Well, not me, Spider-Man, but it counts for something! I made him blush! But he doesn’t know I’m Spider-Man. I mean why would he? Yeah, your scrawny pasty friend is gonna be the vigilante of New York City.” He flopped on his bed. “Still. A rousing success in my book.” Tweek fell asleep with a smile on his face, not even bothering to change.

“Dude, there was a video of him online! He kicked the robber’s asses!” Clyde yelled to his group of friends. Jimmy nodded. “Yeah, I already s-saw it. The dude is k-k-kickass.” Token elbowed Craig. “Hey, you got good pics, right?” “Oh, yeah. Look at this one.” He showed off a picture of Spider-Man kicking the Superman right in the face, the group wincing. “So, where were you l-l-last night, Tweek?” Jimmy asked, his blonde friend sighing. “I was stuck in work the entire time! I heard about it on the news this morning.” Token clicked his tongue sympathetically. “That sucks, man. We have a superhero and you can’t even see him because you’re stuck at fucking Publix.” Craig nodded. “Truly tragic. Oh hey. Everyone’s coming to DC for the decathlon trip right?” The group nodded. “Good. I don’t wanna have to room with Cartman again. That was..traumatic.” The bell rang, the group saying their goodbyes as they ran to class.

The day passed quickly, Tweek getting to his favorite part of the day quickly. Another night on the job, Tweek thought. The sirens tripped almost immediately, the hero standing up. “Already? These guys just wanna give me a busy night.” He started swinging towards the noise. “Don’t they know some of us have papers to write?” He landed in front of the museum, seeing a hole of the glass ripped out perfectly. He crawled through. “Um, excuse me? Can I come in this way or should I make my own hole?” The scampering in the room stopped, a pair of glowing green eyes staring back at him. “Woah! Dude, give a guy some warning when you look at him with demon eyes!” He made his way to the light switch, flicking it on. “Seriously dude. I have night vision, but I still don’t wanna look at those things.” Now that the lights were on, he got a good look at the criminal. They were a bulky, muscular man with metal plating on their armor. They had a large metal mask covering their face. Tweek’s main two interests were the weapons on the man’s hips, and the large mechanical tail. “Oh wow, are you a furry?!” Tweek launched towards the villain, trying to land a kick. “I think furry con is like a month away, but go off I guess.” The villain quickly dodged out of the way with a jetpack. “Woah, dude! You have a jetpack?! That’s sick!”

Tweek grabbed onto the metal tail, hearing a weapon charging up. He twisted out of the way as a purple blue stream of light shot for him. “Holy shit! You’re gonna kill someone with that thing!” The man’s metallic yet gruff voice came out. “That’s the point, dipshit!” Tweek frowned under the suit. “No need to get rude. Just making observations.” He kicked one of the weapons off of the villain, hopping down to examine it. “What’s powering it? This crystal thing in the middle?” He suddenly felt weightless, mainly due to the fact that the villain had trapped him in a purplish box, flinging him onto the wall. When Spider-Man sat up, he looked around seeing no one there. Tweek sighed, grabbing the weapon the villain left. “Well, furry one. Spider-Man zero. But this can’t be the end.” Tweek webbed himself off, mumbling to himself. “You got yourself into deep shit now, didn’t   
you?” 

Tweek woke up to his mom nudging him. “Tweekums, wake up dear! You have to get up for your decathlon trip!” The mention of the trip shot the boy up. His hair looking messier than usual. Stupid mask hair. The boy nodded, quickly changing before running to grab breakfast. His mom sat next to him. “Where is your team going to, dear?” “D.C! We’re learning about history of America. But like we know the gist we’ve all seen Hamilton.” Tweek took the toast sitting on the table. His mom laughed. “Well, I feel like they may have taken artistic licenses. You have fun, dear. Need a ride?” Tweek thought for a second, looking at the web shooters on his wrist. “Um..no, I think I’ll just catch the subway.” His mom smiled. “Alright dear. At least let me make you some coffee for the road.” She walked into the kitchen. “Did you hear about that Spider-Man? I hear your friend, Craig, got some really neat pictures of him!” Tweek smiled to himself. “Hmm. I’ve heard of him.” “Well, I’m glad you’re safe.” Ms. Tweak handed him a travel mug. “Have fun. I love you.” Tweek smiled. “Love you.” He ran out, slipping the mask on in the alley and webbing away.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> god welcome back to i cant post for shit. I got reasons which i'll put at the end but let's just say I have 9 tabs over rn

“Okay, five minutes. I can make it.” He muttered to himself, arriving in about three minutes. He slipped the mask off, stuffing it in his bag. The blonde ran out. “Hey guys! I’m not late, am I?” Clyde shook his head. “Nah. Craigory was just telling us Spider-Man flirted with him.” Craig rolled his eyes. “He didn’t flirt with me. He saw me taking pictures and made a joke. He’s a little shit, but pretty cool.” Tweek felt a smile grow on his face, feeling something in his stomach twist. God, stay cool. Secret identity, remember? “Alright, everyone here? Mkay..”. Mr. Mackey checked off names. “Well everybody, get on the bus, mkay. We have a long trip ahead.” He drawled out. “So, who you guys r-r-rooming with? I managed to g-g-geeee-get a room with S-Sc-Scott.” Clyde wrapped an arm around Token. “I’m in a room with my best friend! Plus, he can buy us a nice dinner.” Token laughed. “Alright, alright. I assume you two are rooming together?” He looked at Craig and Tweek. “Yeah, I guess so. I might take..study breaks out though. There’s a really nice library across from the hotel.” Clyde laughed, ruffling his blonde friend’s hair. “Nerd.” 

As the bus started moving, Clyde started going off on a rant. “Did you hear about the museum robbery?! This creepy glowy eye dude, they’re calling him The Masked Bandit, took some metal from there! They can’t figure out why he took it though. Craig!” He turned to his friend. “Did you get any pics?” Craig laughed. “Why the fuck would they send a sixteen year old to take photos of a crime scene? Besides, I had to come here.” Clyde started going off on another rant, Tweek hearing Spider-Man come up often. He laughed to himself. One of his best friends was fanboying over him. God, if Clyde knew.

The drive went by quickly, for Tweek at least. He slept the whole way. Man, who knew being a superhero was such a workout? He woke up when he felt a broad hand gently nudge him. “Dude, we’re here.” Craig said. Tweek popped up. “Right. Sorry.” Token looked at him. “What’s up? Not sleep well?” “Oh, yeah, just..noisy neighbors. The seniors next door had a party.” They stepped out of the bus, seeing Mr. Mackey already in front of the hotel.

“Alright, everybody get to your rooms, mkay, and we’ll meet out here in an hour for our trip to the Washington Monument.” Mr. Mackey announced. The groups split up, Tweek discreetly shoving his suit into his backpack. “Hey, can we share bags?” Craig asked. “I forgot mine.” “No!” Tweek yelled. “I mean, I’m out of room. I think I’ve got a duffle.” Craig raised an eyebrow. “Thanks.” Tweek grabbed a duffle bag, tossing it to Craig. “No problem.” He sighed. “We should probably..head back. You know how Mackey is.” Craig nodded. “Yeah. I don’t get why we need to come here anyways. It’s not like this’ll improve our decathlon skills.” When the two got back to the lobby, everyone else was already back. “Alright, that’s the last of ‘em. Let’s go, mkay.” The group walked to the Washington Monument, Wendy holding a picket sign. “Wendy, what’s that sign for?” Clyde asked. “I’m protesting! I don’t want to appreciate the beauty of anything built by slaves!” She yelled. Mr. Mackey sighed. “Now, Wendy. I don’t think this was-.” The ticket taker made a cutting motion to his neck. “Go ahead, Wendy. Mkayy, Anyone else not coming up?”

Tweek suddenly felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. ‘Don’t go up.’ His inner dialogue whispered. He raised his hand. “I don’t like heights. I think I’ll stay down here.” Cartman stuck his hand up. “I’m not a heights person either. Hate to get sick.” Mr. Mackey nodded. “Mkay, well, let’s go up class.”  
Wendy began her protest, Cartman sitting on a bench while playing around on his phone. Lazy fuck. Tweek sighed, sitting down as he watched the tower. Eventually, the fear wore off. He opted for watching Wendy’s protest grow in a few numbers. Had she set this up or something? Sounds right. A few minutes later, an ear piercing screech was heard from the top of the monument, several screams following. The black haired girl dropped her sign. “Oh my god! My class is up there!” Cartman had his phone out. “I’ll call 911!” Tweek looked around, grabbing his backpack. “I’ll go get help!” He ran off to a public bathroom, changing into his suit before tossing his backpack onto a bench and webbing it tight. He ran back to the monument, Wendy grabbing his arm before he could climb up. 

“Be careful. My class is up there.” She softly said. Tweek nodded. “I promise they’ll be okay.” He just hoped he could live up to that promise. He started scaling the building. He pressed the middle of his suit, glad he decided on the reconnaissance drone upgrade. He stayed outside the window as the info was relayed back. “Bomb attached to the cable. Remotely detonated. About seven minutes.” Tweek said to himself, sighing. “Of course. I can’t have a normal field trip. Of course some whackjob has to detonate a bomb. Seriously, who tries to murder high school kids?!” 

He hit the window, nothing cracking. “Shit. I need more force..”. Tweek heard a helicopter whirl behind him. “Stand down. We have this area secured.” The hero let out a long sigh, getting himself prepared. “This is how I go. I swear to god. I’m gonna fuckin’ die here.” He jumped off, quickly webbing himself to the underside of the helicopter. “I need force? Okay, let’s get some force!” Tweek quickly flung himself out, kicking through the window. The hero quickly crashed through the window, landing on his knees. He pushed himself up quickly. “I just crashed through a window!”  
Tweek took a breath, running to the elevator. “Spider-Man!” Someone, he thinks it’s Clyde, yells. “Nice entrance.” Craig said in the same monotone voice. Really? He’s dying and can’t even act like he cares? Tweek sighed. “Hey guys, let’s get you out.” He quickly started getting everyone out of the elevator onto the top floor. “Okay, just got Cr-chullo hat left.” Tweek quickly saved himself. As he went for Craig, the elevator let out another loud creak. The cable quickly snapped, everyone screaming in fear.

Tweek quickly webbed the elevator to the wall, seeing it had already fallen a good five feet. “Okay, time’s a wastin, chullo.” The masked hero quickly hopped into the elevator, wrapping his arm around Craig. “Hold on tight. We have a bit of a bumpy ride.” Tweek felt Craig’s arms wrap around him, glad the mask hid his reddening face. He quickly shot a web back up to safe ground, setting Craig down. “By the way, I saw those shots of me in the paper. You’ve got a pretty good talent.” Tweek smiled under the mask, seeing Jimmy and Clyde snicker softly in his peripheral. Craig smiled softly. “Thanks. It helps that you’re pretty photogenic.” The two just stayed like that for a small minute, until Tweek felt his webs snap under him. “Shit.” He quickly fell down. Everyone looked over to see their hero sticking to the side of the elevator shaft. “I’m okay. Someone will be up here shortly! Stay calm!” 

He started scaling down, finally reaching the elevator to see a purple blue crystal with a silvery black metal surrounding it. “This is that shit the museum guy had.” Tweek stashed it in his hand, quickly webbing out of the situation to get back to his stuff. He quickly grabbed his bag, getting changed and running back. “I-I found some help. I don’t know when they’ll be here.” Cartman sighed. “Well don’t worry. Spider-Man showed up. I think they’re safe.” He said. They heard firetrucks approaching, the group sighing in relief as one by one their classmates were saved.

At the hotel, Tweek gripped onto all his friends. “Oh god I’m so glad you’re okay don’t ever do that again!” Clyde laughed. “Easy, Tweekers. We’re okay.” Tweek sighed, letting go. “So what happened?” Jimmy laughed. “Spider-Man and Craig totally had a moment.” Token nodded. “They had a moment for what felt like forever.” Clyde sighed. “We should go clean up though.” Craig nodded. “I’ll catch up.” When they left, Craig turned to Tweek. “Can I tell you something kinda embarrassing?” He asked. Tweek nodded. “Shoot.” “I think I have a crush on Spider-Man.”

Tweek had never felt so happy and upset at the same time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so im working on a voltron fic this fic and an original work while learning some band things which honestly band sucks ass so hhh


	3. Chapter 3

Tweek sighed as the bus slowly pulled up to their school. He was still reeling over his conversation with Craig, slowly walking down to the subway station. He slowly tossed his keys into his hand, opening the door to his apartment. Ms. Tweak smiled as her son walked through the door. “Oh, hi dear! You’re just in time!” Tweek smiled, setting his bag down. “In time for what?” “They’re interviewing some of your little friends who were on that elevator in D.C.” She quickly hugged her son. “Oh, I’m so glad you’re okay! I couldn’t live with losing you.” Tweek hugged her back. “Well, I don’t plan on leaving you anytime soon.” His mom laughed. “Well you better not make any plans. Come sit down, it’s starting.” She pointed to their older tv, sitting on the couch.

“We’re here with some survivors of the Washington Monument incident. Young man, you were in the elevator that day, right?” The reporter asked a bored looking Craig. “Yep. Thought I was gonna die, which honestly what a shitty way to go.” The news quickly bleeped out Craig’s profanity before he continued. “That Spider-Man saved us, then I almost died again, then he saved me again. Not the deadliest school field trip, but it’s up there.” The footage switched to Kenny, his hood off for once. “Dude, I thought I was gonna fuckin’ die!” Another bleep. Poor news editor. “Can’t say I’ve ever gone from an elevator breaking though.” The news reporter looked at him. “What?” “What? You say something?” It switched to a redhead with piercings, who looked up from her sharp purple nails. “Yeah, I almost died, which sucked ass. But I got hella good material for my band! Look out world, The Bandits are gonna write the most bitchin Spider-Man song in the whole fucking world!” A voice was heard off screen. “Red, we’re going off to play at Metro.” “Coming, Nell! Sorry news. A musician’s work is never done. Check out our covers on ITunes!” Just like that, Red ran off. It cut to Mr. Mackey. “Well, I’m just glad everyone’s safe, mkay..we can’t lose a student….not again…”. He looked down, the footage cutting away to the slightly horrified reporter in the studio. “What a..brave class. In other news-”.

Tweek’s mom laughed. “You sure have some fun characters at that school of yours. Any plans tonight?” Tweek laughed softly. “Um, probably just chill, go to the gym, the usual.” “Well alright. Just remember you promised some us time soon. Take care of yourself, Tweekums.” She looked at him. ”You don’t usually leave for the gym until seven, it’s only five. Maybe you should go take a nap. I’ve noticed you’ve been tired.” Tweek nodded. “Yeah, just busy recently. I’ve probably just had too much coffee again.” She nodded. “Just..take care of yourself. I love you.” Tweek smiled, walking into his room. “Love you, Mom.” Tweek laid down for a few hours until his phone started beeping like crazy. He saw images of blue gas clouds and videos of faraway explosions. The young hero hopped up and grabbed his bag, running out. “Okay mom gotta go love you bye!” He rushed out the door, slipping on his suit behind the apartment. Tweek sighed, quickly hooking his phone up to his suit. “Okay, where is this goin’ down?” He saw the Brooklyn address pop up, sighing. “Fine.” The teen webbed his backpack to the wall before swinging away. “Not like I was trying to sleep or anything, no that’s fine..”.

Tweek quickly made it to the address, seeing a van and two men underneath a bridge. Tweek saw an unfamiliar face, and another face behind a metal mask with bright green eyes. The Masked Bandit. Motherfucker. “Okay, you’re sure this’ll get me cash?” The unfamiliar man said. “Of course, man. Try and watch a cop take down this thing. You could push ‘em back in time!” The villain barked out. “And Spider-Man?” The first asked. “Like hell he could take these on! Look dude, I’m saying these things could fuck someone up for real.” Tweek sighed, hopping down. “Well speak of the devil!” He leaned on a bridge post, the two looking over at him. The green eyes glared. “Spider-Man. Perfect, I could use a test target.” The gruff voice laughed as they charged up a weapon. A blue beam shot at the superhero, Tweek barely dodging. 

“Dude, again? God, do you have a life? Some of us have personal lives!” He yelled out, hearing a gun shot. He flipped over to dodge the bullet as he saw the mugger had pulled out a gun. The mugger quickly went down as a brown and orange blur tackled them. Tweek looked up, realizing a passer by had tackled the mugger. “Get the metal face, Spidey! I’ll hold this dude down!” A familiar voice yelled. Tweek connected the dots quickly. Kenny! He lived down in this dump. “Ke-Kid, get back! You could get hurt!” Kenny shrugged, wrestling down the mugger. “Can’t be worse than something I’ve had before.” 

Kenny had kicked the gun out of reach, pinning the mugger down. Tweek felt his senses act up, reaching out for his classmate. A flash of blue came seconds before, aimed straight for Kenny. A second later, Kenny had fallen down, a giant singe mark stained with blood on his torso. “Oh my god..Kenny, Kenny!” Tweek ran over to him, trying to shake the boy back to life. In the few seconds he had been focusing on Kenny, the mugger had gotten up. Tweek heard a gunshot before feeling a sharp pain in his shoulder. He bit his lip to mask a noise of pain.“Dammit.” He turned to the villains, holding his right shoulder. “Alright fuckers, no more playing! You literally just killed a kid!” He took his good arm, punching the mugger square in the face then webbing him to the wall. He turned to The Masked Bandit, who seemed to rev a jetpack attached to his suit. 

“Alright, see ya Spider-Man.” He flew up, Tweek webbing onto his foot, trying to pull him down. Eventually, his shoulder gave out. The hero fell down gripping his shoulder as the masked man flew away. Tweek sighed, picking Kenny up with his good arm and walking over to the McCormick’s house. He slowly knocked on the door, not expecting Kenny’s ten year old sister to answer. “Hello?” Her face fell as she saw her brother’s limp body. “K-Kenny?” Tweek winced. “Um, are your-your parents home?” The girl nodded swiftly, opening the door. “Mom!” She yelled out, sounding choked. Kenny’s mom walked into the messy living room. “Karen, what is it sweethea-OH MY GOD!” The woman dropped a bottle of beer on the ground as she saw her son’s body.”

“Is he..I mean..?” Tweek slowly nodded. “I-I’m so sorry. He just jumped in and tried to help and-”. He cut himself off with a deep sigh. “I promise the man who did this won’t be getting out of a jail cell anytime soon. As for the funeral, allow me to cover it. It’s..it’s the least I can do..”. He set Kenny on the couch slowly. “Th-thank you, sir. Should we..”. Karen pointed at his bullet wound. “Call you an ambulance?” Tweek shook his head. “No, no. The-the police don’t exactly know who I am.” Kenny’s mom sighed. “Hold still, sweet pea. I’ll get that outta ya.” She walked into their bathroom, Karen sitting next to the hero. “Mom’s a nurse. She can patch you up no problem, and no one will ever know who you are.” She had a soft smile as tears fell.

The redhead walked back in with some rubbing alcohol, a scalpel, bandages, tweezers, and a needle and some thread. She grabbed a cloth and held it to Tweek. The boy lifted his mask up just enough to put it in his mouth. “This is gonna hurt dear.” She quickly made the incision, going in to remove the bullet in a few quick minutes. Kenny’s mom quickly applied pressure as she began stitching up the wound and bandaging it. “Hell, ya took that like a champ. Though, you’re a superhero. Can’t be the worst.” Tweek nodded. “I..really should go after that guy. But I’ll come check on you tomorrow.” 

The two nodded. “My condolences.” He said softly. Karen stood up. “Wait!” She handed him a bottle of Advil. “Take these. Your shoulder’s gonna hurt.” The hero gave a small smile. “Thank you. Goodbye.” Tweek walked out, slipping into an alley. He slowly slid the costume off, glad he wore clothes underneath. He stuffed the costume in his pocket, slowly making his way home. Karen was right, his shoulder was hurting like hell. He took two Advil, it wearing off as quickly as it came on. “Stupid metabolism.” Tweek dumped seven in his mouth, the pain meds finally doing their job. The second he got home, the blonde teen fell asleep on his bed.

He woke up the next day, his arm still sore as all fuck, but no bullet wound visible. Tweek slowly pushed himself up, grabbing the still covered in web bag. He gave his mom a small kiss on the cheek before rushing out. He hopped onto the subway, making his way to school. He walked in the doors of school, expecting to see mourning students and memorials of their classmate. What he didn’t expect to see was Kenny McCormick chatting with his friends by his locker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ill take bullshitted medical shit for 600, john


	4. Chapter 4

Tweek stared at Kenny for a few minutes, being snapped back to reality when he felt someone touch his shoulder. “Uh, Tweek? You doing okay?” Clyde asked. Tweek stared. “Kenny’s alive, dude.” His friend raised an eyebrow. “Why wouldn’t he be?” Tweek’s eyes widened more. “He-last night-the-never mind...” Clyde put a hand on Tweek’s good shoulder. “If you’re sure. Anyways, so Cartman totally just got home late and Dad did jack shit!” Clyde continued his rant, as Tweek zoned out, staring at the blonde freckled boy.

Tweek walked over to Kenny’s group, the four turning to see the newcomer. “Woah, Tweek. You okay? You look like you saw a ghost.” Tweek nodded. “Yeah, can I talk to Kenny for a minute?” Kenny shrugged. “Sure.” The two walked outside, Tweek leading him out. “So what’s up? Finally confessing your undying love for me? I mean it’s been l-”. “You died.” Tweek blurted out, Kenny shutting up. “What?” He finally responded. “I saw you die last night! You were dead and now no one seems to remember!” Tweek yelled out, the other sitting down. 

“How long have you been able to remember?” Kenny asked. “Huh?” “Is this the first time you remembered? You’ve seen me die before? How did you even see me d-”. Kenny paused. “You’re Spider-Man.” The two stayed in tense silence for a few seconds before Kenny spoke up. “Wanna ditch for a while? I know a spot up in the Bronx.” Tweek shrugged. “I’ve never ditched.” “It’s easy, I’ll show ya.” Kenny popped up, walking to his dented truck. “Hop in, Tweekers.” Tweek seemed hesitant. “Won’t we get in trouble?” The taller boy looked at him. “It’s public school. They won’t give two shits about two kids skipping for a day.” Tweek shrugged, hopping into the truck.

“Alright, it’s this roof. It’s got a great view of the skyline.” Kenny pointed up the apartment, starting to scale the fire escape. He looked down at Tweek. “You can either follow me or spidey up here. Unless that’s just the suit sticking.” Tweek shook his head, sticking onto the wall. “No, it’s a me thing. One time I tried to turn in homework and the paper stuck to my hand.” He hopped onto the roof. Kenny quickly ran up. “So how’d the whole spider thing happen? Last time I checked you weren’t a superhero.” Tweek sighed, sitting down. “Maybe we should talk about your thing first. How many times have you..”.

Kenny sighed. “I lost count. I hit a hundred deaths by the time I was nine, and no one ever remembers. The closest someone gets to remembering is Kyle. When he sees me die, he’ll come up the next day and tell me he had a horrible dream where I died in front of him. I have to say though, never died by a blue laser gun while helping a local superhero. Glad I can cross that off.” He sat down next to Tweek. “You know, before you came up here, I was like a superhero to Karen.” Tweek turned to him. “Really?” Kenny laughed. “Oh yeah. I had it all laid out. Mysterion: The Boy Who Can’t Die. For a while people were wondering who I was, then they just kinda dropped it. Besides, I didn’t do that shit for them. I did it for Karen.”

Tweek turned to him. “You could still be a hero. You have a pretty cool power.” Kenny shook his head. “It’d be nice, but I don’t come back instantly. I just wake up in my bed the next day good as new. If I came back right away I’d be a pretty bitchin’ hero.” He laughed out. Tweek looked out at the skyline. “You ever worry one death will be your last?” “Sometimes, but after sixteen years of this shit, how likely is it that I’ll stay dead?” He sighed. “Enough about me, though. How did New York’s favorite web-slinger come to be?”

Tweek showed the back of his right hand to Kenny, the faint bite mark still present. “That day at Meyers. We went into a room with spiders, and one must’ve escaped. It bit me, and next thing I know I have powers.” Kenny’s face lit up in recognition. “Yeah! I remember you fainted that day! That was also the day I banged the tour guide.” Tweek shoved him. “Dude, I didn’t need to know that! But seriously, you have so many one night stands. You ever get attached to any of ‘em?”

There’s someone I like, but he doesn’t seem to notice. I mean, it’s not like he doesn’t know I exist, we hang out all the time, but we’re just friends and shit.” Kenny sighed. “But he’s really just..amazing, y’know?” Tweek nodded. “Yeah..I get it.” He sounded a bit far off, Kenny raising an eyebrow. “Oh? Do I smell a crush? Who is it? Spill.” Tweek laughed. “You first, dude.” Kenny laughed back. “You’re just as oblivious as he is. It’s Kyle dude. I like Kyle. Now you spill.” “I like Craig, but he doesn’t like me. Well, he likes me, but not me. He likes Spider-Man.” Kenny looked at him. “He doesn’t know?” Tweek shook his head. “No. No one does. Except you. Even then that was by chance. I haven’t even told my mom. God, she’d flip.”

“Speaking of flip, how the hell are you doing those things?” Kenny asked. “Side effect of the spider bite. I kinda wish it gave me webs though. I have to keep making my own.” Tweek stood up. “But the flips just came on instinct.” He did a backflip, landing on his feet like an Olympian. Kenny whistled. “You make those webs? Dude, you’re a fuckin’ genius!” The smaller laughed. “Not smart enough to avoid a bullet. Luckily it’s healing pretty well.” He pulled his collar down to show the bullet wound. Kenny winced. “That happen last night?” He saw the nod, continuing. “Okay Tweekers, I live down in this shit show. I’m gonna show you the ropes. If you take me for a Spider-Man style joyride.” Tweek laughed. “Deal.”


	5. Chapter 5

Four boys walked out of the school a few minutes after the bell had rung. “Hey, did you f-f-fellas see Tweek today?” Clyde shook his head. “He seemed pretty weird today. Probably just something going on.” Craig shrugged. “I’ll ask him. What’s up with you guys tonight? I finally have a night off of work.” Clyde gave a dramatic sigh. “Liane wants us to have family night tonight. Like I’d ever wanna spend time with fatass over there.” He gestured to Cartman, who was walking out with Stan and Kyle. Token laughed a bit, but gave Clyde a sympathetic look. “We can have a movie night if you want? Clyde, we won’t watch your favs until your ‘family night’ is over.” Clyde smiled widely. “You’re the best friend a guy could ever have!” Token laughed. “Fine, I’ll drive you home.” “You truly get me.” Clyde mumbled, pretending to wipe a tear away. The gang piled into Token’s car, driving off.

Clyde walked into his house, a woman peeking out of the kitchen at the sound. “Oh, hi Clyde! How was your day?” Liane asked. Clyde plopped his backpack down. “Weird. Tweek came in and looked like he saw someone die. He acted like Kenny should be dead, then just ditched out for the rest of the day.” Liane hummed. “Well, that certainly is weird. Could you help me set the table, dear? Your father is coming home soon with Eric and Clara, and I want dinner to be ready by then.” “Sure, Liane.” Clyde hopped up, grabbing five plates.

“Oh, Craig finally got off work, so we’re going a movie night tonight. So I might be out for a bit.” Clyde mentioned. “But Eric and Clara will still be here, so don’t wait up on anything.” Liane handed him the salt and pepper. “Well, Eric hasn’t been home lately. He said he’s been going out with his friends.” Clyde shrugged, placing the seasoning down. “Makes sense. I saw Kenny out a few nights ago.” The door opened, three people walking in. A small girl ran up to Clyde, giving him a big hug. “Hey Clyde!” She laughed out. “Hey Clara! How was school today? Ike isn’t being a di-”. His dad coughed, sending a look to Clyde. “Jerk anymore, right?” Clara shook her head. “Nope. I guess Kyle took care of that.”

“I’d be scared if Kyle was my brother, too.” Cartman finally spoke up, his mom coming over and giving him a hug. “Hello poopsikins!” She gave a quick kiss to Clyde’s dad. “How was work, sweetie?” “Good. Tiring though. We had a rush today of about seven people wanting custom shoes. Homecoming rush I guess.” He responded. “Well luckily, dinner just finished. Lasagna night!” Liane announced. Clyde smiled, his phone vibrating.

Token: Dude. you coming? We’re gonna start the movies soon

Clyde: Yeah, around 6. Liane wants us to do more ‘family bonding’ so were watching the 5 news while eating dinner

Token: May god have mercy on your soul

Clyde laughed, Liane handing him a plate. “I’ll turn on the news, you guys make yourself comfy at the table.” Clara sat next to her brother. “Hey, Clyde? Why are they making my math confusing for no reason? I don’t think even my teacher knows what we’re doing.” Her brother laughed. “Wait ‘til high school, Clare. I know for a fact my teachers don’t know what they’re doing.” The tv spoke up. “Thank you for tuning into Five at Five. Today’s top story is the dubbed ‘Masked Bandit.’ This Masked Bandit has been seen robbing multiple establishments at various hours.”

Clyde leaned in, paying close attention. “Last night, it appears the Masked Bandit was attempting to sell some sort of weapon, before the deal was stopped by local vigilante Spider-Man.” The news anchor continued. “Some of the footage is cut out, but it appears the hero was shot by the buyer in the shoulder, Spider-Man quickly webbing his attacker up for the police. The Masked Bandit appeared to get away, but not without a fair amount of scratches. In other news, the city of Queens is dedicating a new town song to the web slinger..”. Liane gasped. “Boys, when you go out tonight, make sure you take something to defend yourselves! I’d hate for you to run in with one of those dangerous men!” Clyde nodded. “Yeah, I’ll be careful. Don’t worry Liane.” 

He hopped up. “I should go ahead and go. Token will start the movies soon.” Clyde grabbed his bag, waving to his family. “I’ll be back later tonight. Thanks for the lasagna, Liane. It was great.” “Be safe, son!” Clyde’s dad called out. “I will! Love you.” Clyde closed the door, walking out of the house. His dad turned to Liane. “He gets that way sometimes, with the whole...you know.” Liane nodded. “I understand. Poor thing. I can’t imagine how he must feel.” Cartman shrugged. “I’m goin’ over to Stan’s for movie night.” “Be safe, poopsikins!” Liane called out as Cartman left the house.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Clyde led his friends out of the theater, his mom next to the kids. “That was-GHH-amazing!” Tweek called out. “I didn’t know they could make The Wizard Of Oz cool!” Clyde nodded. “Plus they put damn in a Disney movie! Twice!” Token shrugged. “It was pretty good, but I feel like it’s one of those movies where we’ll watch it five years from now and laugh.” “Oh, t-t-totally.” Jimmy laughed. Craig shrugged softly. “The cgi kinda sucked, but I don’t know what I was expecting.” Clyde’s mom laughed. “Well, I’m glad you boys enjoyed it alright. I think we have some time before I need to get you boys home. Wanna go get some ice cream?” The boys cheered out enthusiastically. 

“There’s a nice place Roger and I went to on a date night one time. It should be around here.” Mrs. Donovan led the boys down the block, being stopped when a gun was pointed at her chest. “Cash. Now.” The mugger said in a gruff voice. Her eyes widened. “Boys, go on now. I-I don’t have any cash on me. You can have my purse, but I-I only have some spare change and a debit card.” Token was pulling on Clyde’s shirt. “We gotta go!” He whispered. “No! I can’t leave my mom!” A loud gunshot and a scream was heard, Craig pulling Clyde away. “Clyde we gotta go!” The group ran into a nearby store, crouching under a rack. 

Craig was talking Tweek out of a panic attack, quietly panicking himself. Jimmy was frantically asking the owner to call 911. Token slowly put a hand on Clyde’s shoulder. “Clyde? Clyde can you understand me?” Clyde nodded. “We gotta go check on Mom..we gotta check on her Token!” Token shushed his friend gently. “We will, we will. We just can’t go out right now.” Thirty minutes later, Clyde had to watch his mother’s corpse be wheeled onto an ambulance while his friends held him. That night, his dad and sister latched onto him, not letting go the rest of the night. Her killer was caught at the scene of the crime, being locked up for sixty years. Clyde never went to that movie theater again.


	6. Chapter 6

“Hey guys, I have a huge favor to ask.” Craig said as the gang sat at their regular lunch table. “What’s up?” Clyde asked with a mouth full of cafeteria food. “Red and her band are going on the news. Mom wants the whole family to come to ‘support her’.” The black haired boy rolled his eyes. “Can you guys come with me so I don’t go insane? Plus, you’ll probably get free dinner.” The others nodded, Craig smiling. “Great, see you guys at four at my place.”

Tweek rushed home, his mom smiling. “Hi, sweetheart! How was school today?” “Pretty good. I gotta get ready though. Craig invited Clyde, Token, Jimmy, and I to go watch Red’s band on the news.” Tweek yelled from his room. “Well, that’s great honey! I hope you have fun.” His mom replied as the blonde boy stuffed his backpack. “Okay, what do I need for three hours?” Tweek grabbed a hoodie, his phone charger, earbuds, and some granola bars. Stupid spider metabolism. Speaking of spider, Tweek looked in his closet, grabbing the suit. Kenny had helped him fix the hole in it, so it was as good as new. He hesitantly slipped it into his bag. Better safe than sorry.

Tweek slipped his bag on his shoulders. “I’m gonna go out, Mom! Love you.” Ms. Tweak turned to her son. “Love you, dear. Be careful okay? It’s gotten dangerous out there with all that Spider-Man nonsense.” Tweek gave a nervous laugh. “Yeah. Well, gotta go.” He dashed off, slipping his mask on and hooking his web shooters on. Definitely the best mode of transportation. He whooped as he felt the wind soar past him, landing about five minutes away from Craig’s house. He slipped his mask off, looking at his web shooters. Tweek hummed in thought as his brain came up with ideas. He slipped the mask and shooters into his bag.

Tweek ran to Craig’s house, knocking on the door. His sister opened the door. “Oh, hey Tweek.” Tricia said in greeting. She opened the door to let Tweek in. Clyde, Jimmy, Token, and Craig were sitting on the couch. Jimmy looked up and saw Tweek. “H-H-Hey, dude. We were just a-about to leave.” Tweek shrugged. “Sorry, the metro ran in late.” “No problem. Mrs. Tucker, Tweek’s here!” Clyde called out, Craig’s mom walking down the stairs. “Great! Then we all can go! Okay, let’s get moving! Tric, lock the door on the way out.”

The group piled into the Tucker’s car, driving off the to local news station. The eight walked into the lobby, Red perking up. “Finally! God, we’ve been waiting for what feels like forever. Oh you have to see the studio! It’s great, they have a stage set up and everything! We get to debut our new Spidey Song!” She looked at Tricia. “Ruby! You haven’t met the band yet! This is Nelly, Lizzie, Millie, and Annie.” Tricia looked at the group. “You all have ‘e’ at the end of your name.” Red shrugged. “I don’t though, so it’s not weird! C’mon, we’re about to warm up!” Red rushed off with her bandmates, the group following.

“And we’re back in five, four, three, two-”. The cameraman announced. Craig was sitting on a couch behind the set, taking pictures of the girls for the yearbook. “We’re here with a young rising high school band known as The Bandits. With us is drummer Annie Nelson, keyboarder Lizzie Knitts, bassit Millie Larson, guitarist Nelly Sherman, and lead singer and guitarist Rebecca Tucker.” The girls gave their greetings, going on about their songs. “So we usually do covers but that doesn’t mean we’re not gonna branch out into our own songs. So we’re here with our new song about our local superhero!” Red stood up as a woman ran onto the set. 

“I hate to interrupt, but The Masked Bandit is attacking the planetarium!” She yelled out. The group all stood up. Tweek rushed off. “That’s near Mom! I gotta make sure she’s okay!” He ran out of the room, grabbing his backpack. “Where are our mobile cameras?!” The news anchor yelled. “I have a mobile camera.” Craig suggested. The news anchor handed him a small chip. “Get us good footage, kid.” Craig nodded and ran off, his friends staring. “Did you just send a fuckin’ teenager to go get footage of a supervillain?!” The man’s response was interrupted by Spider-Man swinging past the building.

Tweek moved towards the planetarium, pulling the news feed up into the corner of his vision. He saw Craig’s shaky camera approach the location, sighing loudly. “God dammit, you beautiful dumbass.” The hero snuck through a broken window, quickly shooting a web at the Masked Bandit. He tried to pull the villain back, his sharp claws on his suit ripping the webs. Tweek could see Craig’s blue chullo hat outside. He could see from the news that he was getting a pretty good shot. Tweek saw the Masked Bandit store something in his jetpack/backpack thing, then watched his bright green eyes dart over to Craig. Tweek shot a web towards Craig, the villain cutting it down and grabbing the junior reporter.

“Get the fuck off of me, bitch!” Craig fixed the camera strap in his mouth, swinging punches and kicks. The jetpack whirred off as the Masked Bandit went airborn. Tweek sighed, webbing towards the two. He could see the Masked Bandit holding Craig over a building, his chullo slipping off. Tweek stood on an opposite building. “Put him down. Or I personally will take that jetpack of yours and beat you with it.” The Masked Bandit set Craig’s camera down, making sure it had a good shot of him dangling Craig by his right foot. Tweek quickly webbed up a large ball, throwing it in the Masked Bandit’s face. “Heads up, jackass!” The villain moved his hands to pry the webbing off, letting go of Craig.

Tweek cussed, quickly moving to grab Craig. He webbed down and swung over, wrapping his arm around his friend. “We really gotta stop meeting like this, chullo.” Craig laughed softly. “You thought pissing off the almost murderer was a good idea?” “I got you away from him, and that’s what matters.” He sat Craig down, picking his chullo up. “I’ll get your camera back. Right now I gotta catch that son of a bitch.” The black haired boy slipped his hat on, smirking. “Fuck him up for me.” Tweek webbed up, sending a punch straight to the villain’s face. It knocked the web ball off, the Masked Bandit quickly grabbing one of his fancy guns.

He shot after Tweek, the hero doing quick flips out of the way. Spider-Man sent a quick kick to the man’s knees, pulling on his mask when he was down. All he could see was straight brown hair and an angry brown eye staring at him before the man jetpacked away. Tweek shot two webs on his jetpack, going to pull him down. Eventually, the webs snapped from the pull, Tweek sighing. He flipped over, turning the camera off. He webbed away, quickly getting back to his house. He burst into his small apartment, his mom hugging him. “Oh dear, are you okay?! I was watching the news and I couldn’t help but think the worst.” Tweek nodded. “Yeah, yeah. I was worried for you!” He hugged back, his mom turning the TV up.

“It appears we’ve lost signal, and that the Masked Bandit has eluded capture again. However, Spider-Man has saved a young teen’s life today, the teenager coming out of this seemingly uninjured.” Tweek sighed in relief, instantly texting his friends.

Tweek: Just got to mom! What happened?

Clyde: Dude Craig went out to go get footage because the reporters clearly a dumbass and he got snatched by the masked bandit and got dropped from a building and spider man saved him and then they fought but the masked bandit got away! You really didnt see any of this?

Tweek: I wasnt really looking at the tvs. I’ll make sure to check on Craig later today though

A couple hours later, Tweek knocked on the Tucker’s door, Craig answering it. The blonde quickly wrapped his friend in a genuine hug. “You seriously need to stop putting yourself into these stupid ass, dangerous decisions.” Craig laughed, hugging back. “I already got this from Mom, Dad, Red, and Token. Don’t make me suffer anymore.” Tweek gave a mock sigh. “Fine, just no more stupid ass, dangerous situations.” Craig nodded. “Understood. Now do you wanna come in and play shitty games or no?”  
That night, a slightly dusty but still in great condition camera was webbed to Craig’s window.


	7. Chapter 7

“I’m just sayin’ I recognized him, Ken! He’s someone I know! Someone I know killed you! And shot me! And almost killed Craig!” Kenny cut Tweek off by shoving a chip in his mouth. “Dude, hate to doubt you, but we’re in New York City. The odds of you knowing this supervillain are like, one in a million.” Ever since Kenny and Tweek had skipped school, they spent more time together. With all their friends getting jobs and growing up, the two had stuck together to talk about things they couldn’t say to anyone else. Like the constant fear of death as a superhero. “I mean it! My senses were totally freaking out! I know them, I just don’t know how.”

Kenny grabbed another handful of chips. “What if it’s just some random you passed one day? But stressing about who the Masked Bandit is isn’t gonna help.” The shorter blonde nodded. “Yeah. Yeah I should just..focus on taking him down. So, anyone you’re taking to homecoming?” “No, I’m going with my friends because homecoming is a lame excuse of a prom that gets everyone hyped up for nothing.” Kenny snorted out. “So, you couldn’t get enough courage to ask Kyle?” Tweek asked. “You doin’ any better, shortstack?!” “Nope, we’re all going to Clyde’s house, then going to homecoming.” Kenny laughed. “May god have mercy on your soul. We’re all going to Stan’s before, and I can deal with his dad, I could not deal with having to see Kyle’s mom and his brother. God, I’d shoot myself right there.” Tweek laughed, the two returning to their trash tv.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
“So fellas, we’re meeting at C-C-Clyde’s at seven, right?” Clyde gave two finger guns. “Bingo! Try and look nice for once, tonight is important. Craig if you wear that stupid hat tonight I will toss it into a bonfire.” Craig scoffed. “Clyde, it’s homecoming, not someone’s wedding. It’s not that important.” Tweek shrugged. “It’s still gonna be fun. I mean, we hang out all the time, but this time it’s kinda fancy. Who knows, maybe Clyde will get decked by Bebe again?” The group snorted, Clyde flipping his blonde friend off. “Very funny, dick. That was one time!” “Yeah, one time immortalized on my phone gallery.” Jimmy added, the group laughing again. “You guys are dicks, you know that?”   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Tweek tried to run the brush through his hair again, finally tossing it across the room in defeat. “My hair is a fucking nightmare.” He muttered, flattening the mess down slightly. “Better. I think.” He walked out of his room, his mom gasping. “Oh honey, look at you! Oh, let me take a picture!” She whipped her phone out, taking a few pictures of her son. “I still don’t get why you’re bringing your backpack.” Tweek’s eyes widened. “Oh, it’s just movies. In case the guys wanna watch any of our favorites afterwards.” Ms. Tweak nodded. “Okay, dear. Have fun. Be safe. Especially on your way down there! I’d hate for you to get caught up in that superhero mess!” Tweek forced out a laugh. “Yeah, I’d hate that too. Love you!” He rushed out, checking his phone to see a quick text from Kenny.

Mcwhoremick: dude youll never believe this

SpiderBitch: what happened??

Mcwhoremick: stan and kyle are going together to hoco

SpiderBitch: what?! dude im so sorry

Mcwhoremick: im okay. promise. he’s happy and i guess that’s what’s important. it’s just a high school crush anyways, nothing was gonna happen  
SpiderBitch: still that sucks. you’re welcome to come back after hoco to my house and we can watch some trash tv

Mcwhoremick: you’re a godsend Tweek Tweak

Tweek laughed softly, knocking on Clyde’s door. The door swung open, Tweek looking up in the brown eyes of Eric Cartman. A moment of familiarity washed over Tweek, before sudden recognition. So that’s where I knew him from. Tweek thought as he stared at Cartman with a mildly horrified expression. “Um, are you gonna come in or keep staring at me like you’re plotting my murder?” Tweek shook his head. “Sorry, sorry, spaced out. He rubbed his bad shoulder, walking into the Donovan’s house. Tweek slipped his suit jacket off, the edges of his shirt sliding off a bit. 

Cartman looked at the scar. “What the fuck happened there?” Tweek looked, quickly fixing his shirt. “Oh, I walked into a branch. It scraped me up pretty bad..”. He muttered out. Cartman just hummed, calling out for Clyde. A few minutes of awkward silence later, Clyde barrelled down the stairs. “Sorry. Liane was stressing about ‘being careful because of the hero nonsense’. It’s like, I already survived a supervillain attack, what’s one more?” Clyde plopped himself next to Tweek. “Hey, you never told me why you didn’t go up that day. “Oh, I’ve just never been a fan of heights. I guess it’s good I was down though. To get help.” 

Cartman stared him down. “Speaking of, the help didn’t come. Not until Wendy called 911.” Tweek laughed awkwardly, scratching his arm. “Well, they must have heard Spider-Man helped.” “Yeah, it’s a good thing he was coincidentally in D.C.” The brunette said. Tweek gulped, rushing to the door as soon as he heard the first knock. “Oh, hey Jimmy! Hey, Token! Hey, Craig!” Clyde smiled. “Alright, thots, y’all ready?!” The group started walking out. “Hey, Tweek. You forgot your jacket.” Cartman called. Tweek walked back in to get it, Cartman quickly grabbing his wrist.

“Look, we’re not dumbasses. You know who I am, I know who you are. But unlike you, I don’t give a shit about who gets hurt. So if you wanna make sure your friends and your mom are okay, you’ll keep your mouth webbed up closed, and stay out of my business. Got it?” Cartman murmured. Tweek nodded, snatching his jacket. “Good. Have fun tonight.” He gave a short smile, letting go of Tweek. The blonde slipped his jacket on and fixed his backpack, looking at the deep bruises on his wrist. He walked out, hopping into the car with a fake smile.


	8. Chapter 8

When the group finally got to homecoming, they rushed into the gym excitedly. Red’s band was loudly blasting music, most of the students dancing. The five quickly got their way in, Tweek’s mind darting to Cartman several times. Clyde stood up. “Hey, I have something I gotta say-”. Tweek stood up, rushing. “I’ll be back in a minute! Don’t wait up!” He rushed out of the gymnasium, quickly ducking into the bathrooms to change. He webbed his backpack to the ceiling, rushing out the window. 

The second he got out, a force pushed him back through a bus. “Ow, fuck! What the hell was that?” He looked through the hole to see a man holding a large metal gauntlet with sparks of energy coming from it. Tweek sighed. “You have got to be fucking with me. Dude, who the hell are you?!” The man laughed. “I was hired by Mr. Cartman to make sure you don’t interfere. I am his personal dealer ever since you started getting in the way of-”. “Yeah, I asked who you were, not your life story. I hate to be short with you but my friends are saying something important and I don’t wanna miss out for a dipshit like you.” He rushed towards the man, getting sent back through two more buses. “Shit..Where’s Cartman?!” He yelled, rushing to stand up. 

The man looked ready to fire again, before a loud bang rushed through the parking lot, followed by the gauntlet powering down. Tweek quickly rushed over to see Kenny with his parka tucked under his suit, the hood covering his face from the man. He had a small handgun. He walked up to the man, holding the gun up. “Where’s the fatass, bitch?” The man kicked Kenny, who quickly shoved the gun in his face. “Let me rephrase that. Tell me where he is or I shoot you.” “H-He went to rob a Williams Inc truck! That’s all I know!” Tweek smiled under his mask, pulling Kenny aside. The man started running away, Tweek quickly webbing him to a wall. “Yeah, no. The police will be here to arrest your ass in like three minutes.” He turned to his friend. “You got your car?” Kenny shook his head. “Nope, but I can hotwire one.”

A few minutes later, the duo had taken off at top speeds. “Oh my god, Kenny, that was amazing! Like you just came up and shot right in the weapon and- wait where did you get a gun?”Tweek yelled. “Not important. What are you finding out delivery wise?” Kenny asked. Tweek looked at the data displayed in his mask. “I’ve got one a few miles from the company. Looks like it’s carrying some valuable metals and some weird science shit. Kinda looks sketchy in all honesty. But it’s the only truck out there.” Kenny revved the engine. “Let’s go.” They sped off further down the street, passing red lights. “Okay, Ken. When we get there, your job is get the drivers and staff out of there. I don’t need to start a casualty count.” Ken nodded, eventually driving right behind the truck to see The Masked Bandit perched on top, clawing his way in. 

“Now or never.” Tweek muttered, hopping onto the back and scaling it. He quickly webbed Cartman’s claw, yanking him down. “I’d get off if I were you.” Cartman sliced the web, charging for Tweek. The hero quickly flipped over, sending a punch to the back of Cartman’s head. Cartman got a quick scratch on his chest, knocking Tweek down. “I told you not interfere you stupid insect.” Tweek shot a foot up to Cartman’s stomach, hopping up. “Actually, spiders are arachnids, but thanks for playing!” The two went at it for a few minutes, the main damage coming when Cartman scratched up Tweek’s neck. He hissed, but kept going with a hit to the face.The truck started driving around wildly. “Guess he got the driver out.” The truck charged towards a telephone wire. Cartman looked over, flying up. Tweek quickly webbed onto him. “That’s not gonna work dipshit! We’ve done this enough for you to know that!”

“Think again bitch.” Kenny’s voice rang out before two shots went off, directly into Cartman’s jetpack. He fell onto the truck, Kenny blowing his gun’s smoke away. “Fuck you, Lucky Charms.” Tweek snorted, his mask eyes widening when he saw how close they were to the telephone wire. “Okay, okay, okay!” He picked Cartman up, hopping off. Tweek quickly webbed him up. “Dude..you are like..the fucking best at this..”. Tweek said softly to Kenny. “Yeah, who knew all you needed to beat up bad guys was a gun?” Tweek quickly webbed Cartman up, turning to Kenny. “Get his gloves off! They can cut web!” He rushed off to the truck, grabbing the front of it. “This worked for Mr. Incredible, it can work for me.” Tweek pushed back against the truck. “Don’t crash don’t crash don’t crash.” He felt the pole lightly graze him before the movement stopped, sighing in relief. “Oh my god. Kenny thank you so much! If there’s any way I can repay you-”. “There is a way.” Kenny took his phone out. “I want a picture with Spider-Man to have bragging rights.” Tweek laughed. “Deal.”

Tweek sighed, hopping into the nearby diner. He opened his phone, sending a quick text to Clyde about what the important news was. He got a quick “oh token and i are dating”. The blonde quickly called his friend. “Clyde! When did that happen?!” Clyde laughed over the phone, music blaring from his end. “When you left. Where the hell did you go anyways?” “Oh, mom needed me asap. Sorry I couldn’t make it. Tomorrow I’m gonna badger you with questions.” Tweek said, walking home in his messy homecoming suit. “Oh hey gotta go! Stan’s super drunk and gonna fight Cartman! I’ll take a video!”

Tweek snuck in through his window, seeing a small picture and a note on his bed. As he looked, he noticed it was the selfie Kenny and him took. “Thought you might like to have this. Don’t lose it copies cost money! Also that sentiment shit too. Trash tv night tomorrow! No excuses, you need a day off! - Kenny.” Tweek laughed, propping the photo up on his corkboard and taking his suit off, his spidey suit underneath. His train of thoughts was interrupted suddenly by his mom. “What the fu-”  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Tweak Tweak Will Return.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so here's the end of the first arc! I hope you guys enjoyed and I promise there's more coming soon

**Author's Note:**

> so i deleted my other because i was like this aint right so this is a rewrite enjoy


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